This Is Koley's World!

Oct 02

All Alone…

I’ve been feeling quite lonely lately. I feel like a burden. Like people are only my friend because they don’t wanna hurt my feelings. I even at times, feel like a burden to my family. I shouldn’t feel this way. I should be happy living life! But lately, I’ve felt.that its better that I disappear for a little while. Purely. just to be reassured that someone cares about me.

Sep 16

I Wish You Knew….

You’re always on my mind lately. I miss seeing you. Even though you’re not that far away, I feel like you’re across the world! I wish I could gum up the courage to tell you how I feel, how much you mean to me, how special you are and how much I need you in my life. I don’t know what started it all, but ever since July, I’ve had this sudden attraction to you. They say that if you have a crush on someone for more than 4 months, than you’re already in love, but to be 100% honest, I feel like at times, I’ve been in love with you for the past 8 years and just kept denying my feelings because you are my friend. A part of me wishes you could read this, but you don’t have a Tumblr…. I hope I get to see you soon! I will text you sometime this week. Just to say hey! :) And even if friends is all that we remain, I hope you know how close to my heart you really are! <3

Jun 28
Jun 28
Yum!

Yum!

Jun 24

Pros and Cons

People say it’s better to be optimistic. I daily fail at this task. However, I do again daily give it a try. I just find it hard to be optimistic when so much ill things have happened in my life. I don’t trust very many people anymore. Im always the one who ends up emotionally hurt and scarred in one way or the other. The Bible says that we should live like Jesus. If I recall correctly, Jesus was a very forgiving soul and I try to mimic his forgiving practices yet, I’m more often than not hurt again by the same people. There’s a girl that I’ve known since my junior year of high school and it seems like every year since we have an annual argument and pause at being “friends” for awhile. Yet I feel like im always the “bad guy” in this situation. And then, there’s this guy that I have known for quite sometime and about 4 years ago we started to date. Since then, we are constantly attempting to get back together and something whether it be our disapproving parents, the church we go to, him moving, ex girlfriends, or just the lack of trust I have in him, I can’t seem to tell him no. Now yes, I’ve been in love with him all this time but, he doesn’t seem to feel the same. Yet everytime something goes awry between us, I get treated like dirt. I also end up always forgiving him for the wrong he has done. This has been on my heart a lot lately and I know that I have a lot to think and pray about I just hope that I make the right decison for me. Wish me luck in my thoughts and prayers as I determine my path from here.

Jun 18
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Jun 18
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Jun 18
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Jun 07
Jun 04
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